Sunday, 29 November 2015

I love and approve of my self unconditionally.....or do I?

Medium Gillian Holland on

 Lighting up Your Life with Affirmations

I've got lots of ideas running around in my head, as we all have,  but they're not always positive more's the pity, and these can hold us back when we hit a crossroads. So I thought I would have another look at one of Louise Hay's perhaps most famous affirmation taken from her book 'You Can Heal Your Life' and see where it takes me. 'You Can Heal Your Life' is a book I first discovered in the 80's well before Louise went on to found her now world wide publishing house.

How do they work?:

Proper use of  affirmations can truly Light up your Life! But you have to see them through to the end, and then your crock of gold could be waiting at the end of the rainbow; it could be the light bulb moment which truly transforms your life.  I think one of the defining moments in my own life was 'realising it's okay to be ME rather than trying to be the person other people want me to be!'

The aim is to change your negative thinking pattern into something more positive; something that will inspire and motivate you to move forward rather than hide away in the shadows thinking you are not up to the mark. The knock-back thinking is the bit of us that's resisting change and therefore holding us back.

For every action there is an equal and opposite reaction, e.g. so say 'Don't you look marvellous?', and you are likely to hit a whispered knock back along these lines,'Oh yeah, and just who do you think you are trying to kid?' 

Now you could even get a knock-back from a supposed friend, but more often than not, we are our own worst enemies.  We sabotage ourselves to the nth degree with our negative thought patterns just when we are trying to change ourselves for the better.

Here are some of my own negative knock-backs as I worked with this affirmation. Believe it or not recognising them,  but not beating yourself up, is more power to your elbow., especially when you realise just how much they have really been holding you back. In fact, not beating yourself up is the 'key to transformation.'  The affirmation you will see in italics, and my negative kick-backs underneath in plain and simple script.

I love and approve of myself unconditionally (5a.m.)

Yes, you got it, 5a.m. It's still dark outside, but I am up and ready to go,. I whip out Louise Hay's book, a  journal and pen. Deep breath - I can do this!

I attack the words with gusto, shoving them down into my journal, spidery letters crawling across the page.  I Can Do This! I Really Can Do This!

No enjoyment here, though, just a tour of duty.  I grit my teeth, yes that's right literally grit my teeth, head down, white knuckles taut on the pen.

This is something I have to do, something I have to battle through; another chore, another duty to perform  It's a military exercise fine tuned with precision, no frills and, heaven forbid, certainly no enjoyment especially at this hour of the day! Mindless!

I love and approve of myself unconditionally

I loosen my jaw, don't want any MORE trouble with my teeth now do I? (Those teeth of yours Gillian, well, really!)  I need to approach this exercise more openly, and with feeling, not just robotic mindlessness.

What's the difference then in the two attitudes?  Well I feel more expansive, but nonetheless ANXIOUS.  I've opened up to the possibility that there is far more going on underneath the surface of that very optimistic affirmation.

WHOA!  I don't just have to chant it, I have to LIVE it! Darn it!

Okay there's lots more to this than I had realised! Am I really being asked to be open to a multitude of feelings I would rather not know about? Do I really have to confront all of this?

I feel like an absolutely plonker: plonking words down on paper, only to be answered with a rat-a-tat mocking full-frontal attack, ' Oh do you now?'

Its churning up all these feelings; anger, fear resentment, frustration, you name it and I seem to have it. 'There you go, told you so!' that voice mocks all over again.  

The Lids come off the saucepan and the secrets out. 'So Alright, No I don't love and approve of myself unconditionally.  I am a long way away from that...It's cold, its damp and very dark outside, the duvet's much more inviting, so I am not sure whether I want to play this game any more!

I've been scuppered!!!  Okay, so I am not so perfect, you've guessed it! I'm not all apple pie and custard (too fattening); the gingham check on my pinny (apron) has worn exceedingly thin, plus I don't like what I see in the mirror as I crank myself out of bed Tiger Balm in hand.

I love and approve of myself unconditionally

It's not about the words exactly, its more about the feelings they generate. OMG!

And right now , right up until this very minute, they've generated more than their fair share of 'Don't be ridiculous!'  not to mention, since it's Christmas, a few 'Bah Humbugs!', too.  I'm cringing, positively cringing!

I love and approve of myself unconditionally

Well Awright!!! Now I feel just plain guilty. All this time talking to myself? Talking to myself, now isn't that supposed to be some kind of a sign, and not too auspicious a sign either?  It surely can't be right to devote all this time to ME; little old me???  It's a bit of a game really isn't it? A scam even? Overindulgent?

I search my memory bank for an excuse to stop! Then it hits me!!! (Whoops that's the wrong word!).

Just what IS the purpose of all this?

Life's not meant to be regimented,  we are all meant to be true to ourselves. 

If we call ourself a silly old twit, we could be silly, we could be old, but a twit? NAH!!!

 I may be eccentric!
 What's more, I may have more than a few sags and bags
 ( Oh dear, don't you just love them? )

I mean those scales have just got to be wrong RIGHT?

And I never could spell either!

But I have the right to be ME
I am an individual in my own right!

Let me say that again. I have the right to be Me.

That is what marks me out as an individual.

 We can either go for the jugular, so to speak, or we can say it 'with loving acceptance'. We can accept our faults lovingly, or we can beat ourselves up and give ourselves a hard time because we don't quite meet everyone's expectations, and we're not part of the robotic regiment! 

  I may be eccentric, but at least I am being ME. And as the affirmation says,

'I love and approve of myself unconditionally!
We are who we are, eccentric or not.
It's the warts which mark us out as Individuals
And we are all born to be Individuals.
Our individuality is our gift to the world.

Gillian Holland copyright 2015

Louise Hay's Book 'You Can Heal Your Life' is available from Hay House UK

Wednesday, 25 November 2015

Peace on Earth - channelled information

Peace on Earth

 'Peace is the doorway into the Higher Dimensions.  It is a state of consciousness in which you are at one with all things, and the place you go to when  all that remains in your heart is peace and love for your fellow human beings and more importantly yourself.

In other words, your Higher Self and Lower Self have come together as 'one heart, one mind and one voice'. You are no longer in 'two minds' as they say, you have come to a decision which brings peace to your heart. Whenever you experience being in two minds, you cannot experience peace, because your heart is telling you once thing, whereas your mind is pulling you in another direction all together.  And your head, dominated by fear, is telling you you are just not good enough to walk through any door marked peace.

The human mind with all its self-doubt and judgement was never intended to sit in the driving seat of your life.  It was intended to serve. And it was intended to serve the Light which shines in all humanity.  Light is the backdrop for all the Universe. It is the stuff behind all of creation.

You are all destined to pour more light onto Earth.  This comes through the realisation that you are that light. Peace comes when you stop fighting and surrender to the power that is build into the fibre and fabric of your entire being. Why fight against your true heritage? Your  purpose  is to live together in 'compassionate love'  and to create 'a Garden of Eden' or Heaven on Earth  Fear is divisive, and demonstrates separation from the Source of your Being. And Love conquers all.

channelled through Gillian Holland 2015

Sunday, 15 November 2015

We will remember......

We will remember.......who we are!

Medium Gillian Holland on Remembrance Day and the aftermath of Paris

Remembering who we are

Remembrance Day 11:11 is always a very powerful time of year, and Wednesday was no exception. What a wonderful evening spent in company of both heavenly and earthly Angels in Remembrance at my monthly Angel group.  This is not only a time to remember all the Souls who paid the ultimate sacrifice on our behalf, but a time to remember we are 'Spirit!'  Remembrance is a time for healing, and goes beyond words.

We as Spiritualists call this the Silence, and it is the 'going into the Silence' rather than shying away from it, which makes all the difference.  

Paris  13.11.15

Right now most of us are feeling numbed by the atrocities in Paris.  Our hearts go out to the French nation and everyone - ordinary people out just enjoying a Friday night- who were caught up in the onslaught.  There is a sense of outrage beneath the shock of such a violation.  Once again candles are being lit and flowers are being placed for the fallen, and those traumatised by this incidence. Once again, people ordinary people are being called to come together in an Act of Remembrance.

The Silence isn't a 'nothing space', and certainly not just a mechanical act of duty, as some might have us believe. The Silence is a state of consciousness. It is who we really are beyond the labels, negative judgements and criticisms we've allowed to dominate our lives.

The Silence is the very essence of life itself.  It may be Silent; it may be wordless, but it is teeming with a potential for life, and therefore constantly renewing itself.  In this Space, we remember who we are: Spirit. It is this Spirit, which runs through all peoples of the world no matter who we are or where we come from. The Divine Flame we all know as Spirit is the substance of all life, and it is founded on love, compassionate love.

When we touch Spirit in the Silence we take heart in spite of the tragedy. We are one Global Nation beyond our differences. Spirit is our hope and therefore our salvation however you choose to label the word. It is certainly not the possession of anyone in particular but available to us all.  Most of us want nothing other than to live out our lives in peace, harmony and companionship with our families, friends, children and grandchildren. 

And in the silence, we are inspired to transform and heal life for those same children and grandchildren.  We are inspired to take heart once more in spite of the sorrow and tragedy.  
One simple act of Remembrance has the ability to transform the world.  And so be it.

Friday, 6 November 2015

Archangels to the rescue

Celebration of Spirit through Greater Awareness of SELF

Healing is an invitation to remember who we are
in the company of Angels and the Realms of Spirit!

Your connection to Source energy

Sometimes we just have to let go and allow Spirit and the Angels to 'Light up our Lives' the way they see fit.  They do have a bird's eye view, whilst our own vision is very much more limited. I invite you to Believe in the Magic that is Spirit.  We are Spirit first and foremost and once we acknowledge it then the skies the limit, we can truly move mountains in service of humanity.  Not through force, not through fear, but by embracing the light and the love that is essence of our Being and dancing to a loving rather than a fearful beat.

We are all born to dance to the rhythm of the Universe with open hearts, 
open minds and open voices.
A vision filtered through love rather than fear.

Last night at Welwyn Garden City was much quieter than normal, but it was still a magnificent 'Celebration of Spirit!' amid the occasional flash, bang wallop for another more worldly Guy Fawkes celebration outside.

We spent our evening working under the direction of the four major archangels Michael, Uriel, Gabriel and Raphael.  However, last night we were joined by another equally powerful archangel, Jophiel, to concentrate on some healing work before opening to the Angels for some personal guidance.

Six pointed Star

We were directed to work with the six pointed star, which many of us associated with White Eagle's work, too. This star is the symbol of perfect healing.  It contains two triangles one facing upwards, whilst the second faces down towards earth.   It also represents both aspects of ourselves;
a) our personal identity in this life time, the ego or personality self - facing upwards
b) the divinity which is the core of our being the Higher or Divine Self - facing downwards

It is the symbol for wholeness, but is also associated with Judaism and the Star of David.  It represents compassionate and unconditional love.  Therefore unconditional love is the force that has the capacity to heal us all.


Jophiel is another one of my favourite Archangels and is said to guard the Tree of Life in the garden of Eden.   I associate her with Space, and if you are a Trekkie fan you will know that 'Space is the final Frontier!'

The six pointed star is literally our Guiding Star and can transform the space we inhabit. It is our True North because it is based on our felt sense, rather than our negative thoughts and fears.

And it is through this connection that we come to understand we are unconditional love.It is a love which surpasseth all human understanding, and yet when we touch this beautiful energy, it can renew and heal every fibre of our Being.  Yes really!

Whilst our mind beams out negative thoughts telling us we are unworthy of love, our Higher Self beams out the exact opposite 'We are Love'.

It invites us to understand, therefore, there is no way we can be separated from Source because that is who we are.  Our entire body is created from a template of unconditional love.

Healing is an invitation to Remember Who You Are!

The meditations last night were very powerful indeed.   We met up with our loved ones, some of us for the very first time since they crossed to the other side. This is always a very powerful experience, bringing us to the realisation that we are all eternal beings, and therefore our loved ones are never far from our side.  Others of us received profound personal realisations as they take the next step forward on the journey called life.  Everyone was completely wrapped in the beauty of the Angels wings feeling really safe and secure in the energy. What a celebration

Jophiel invites us to fill our personal space with the Light of the Greater Understanding of who we truly are.  As we move further into the light our negative beliefs and thinking just melt away into the Light of the Love that we are.

copyright Gillian Holland 2015

If you would like to learn more about the Angels why not try Angelic Reiki Training 28/29th. November with Gillian

The next Awareness Class with Gillian

Angel Card Readings with Gillian at Welwyn Garden City Fayre on 14th. November

Angel Evening with Archangel Azrael at Acorn in Hemel Hempstead 11th. November 7.30 onwards  inbox Gillian

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